The role of a wedding witness is a very important one. Without the two witnesses, there can be no wedding.
The primary duty of a wedding witness – and the purpose of the role as a whole – is to validate the marriage. This, of course, is merely the legal aspect. Wedding witnesses are people close to the couple; they are almost always chosen from among the immediate family or their closest friends, and are particularly important guests.
Did you know? For wedding witnesses, and wedding seating plan It also plays a prominent role. The witnesses sit at the head table; if you arrange the seating in accordance with Hungarian customs, you must seat them next to the bride’s mother and father.
1. How do you choose a witness for your wedding?
The role of the wedding witness is just as important as it used to be. However, before asking someone to be a wedding witness, people used to take different factors into account than those that are now customary when making this important decision.
2. How were wedding witnesses chosen in the past?
In the past, in keeping with tradition, the couple would choose as their wedding witnesses those who stood out from the rest – whether they were wealthy, influential or socially respected.
Even in the past, they did not choose strangers for this role; these respected, influential people were chosen from among family or friends. In short, the task was to find the wealthiest, most influential person amongst your family or friends and ask them to be your best man.
There was also a practical reason for this custom, as the chosen witnesses provided financial support to the young couple. It is believed that, in addition to this, it was also their duty to ensure that they provided the most beautiful and valuable wedding gift. In the past, being a witness wasn’t a particularly rewarding role, but today those chosen have a much easier time of it. 🙂
3. How are wedding witnesses chosen these days?
A wedding witness is a very important person; they have key responsibilities both on the big day and during the planning leading up to it. You need to think carefully about who you will ultimately ask to be your witness.
In many cases, a family member, sibling, cousin or the oldest or closest friend is asked to act as a witness.
There are no specific rules about who should be your wedding witness; the main thing is to choose someone you trust completely. As well as needing their signature to marry the love of your life, they’ll have many other important duties to fulfil, which will certainly take up their time. They’ll need to be there to support you wholeheartedly wedding planning, a hen party or a stag party whilst organising it and dealing with other practical matters.
4. Who can be a witness at a wedding?
In Hungary, marriage is protected by law, and this law states that persons under the age of 18 – that is, minors – and persons lacking legal capacity may NOT act as witnesses at a wedding.
Any person who has reached the age of 18 and has legal capacity may act as a witness at a wedding.
5. Can a family member, friend or acquaintance from abroad be your witness at your wedding?
Yes, but the law applies to them too, so they must be at least 18 years old and have legal capacity.
6. Who cannot be a witness at a wedding?
It follows from the previous point that persons under the age of 18 or those lacking legal capacity cannot be your wedding witnesses. Anyone else to whom these conditions do not apply may be asked to be a wedding witness.
7. How should witnesses prove their identity?
Both Hungarian and foreign nationals must provide proof of identity when acting as witnesses. Hungarian citizens must present an identity card, foreign nationals a passport, and Hungarian citizens living abroad either one or the other. In addition, a residence card may also be required, so please ensure that no witness leaves theirs at home.
Tip: Always check that the witnesses’ documents are in order. Make sure they haven’t expired, that you have the originals, and that they aren’t torn in two (you might laugh, but it’s happened before). It’s very awkward if it turns out on the wedding day that the person you’ve chosen can’t be a witness after all.
Marriages must be registered; couples must apply for this. During the process, the couple planning to marry are practically required to declare even the number of hairs on their heads.
The good news, however, is that you are not yet required to provide the wedding witness’s details when registering the marriage. In other words, on the one hand, you have time to ask someone to be your witness if you haven’t done so yet; and on the other hand, even if your witness left their ID at home just yesterday, it’s not the end of the world.
8. How should you ask someone to be a witness at a wedding?
The bride said ‘I do’ – it really did happen engagement. After this full stop, the wedding planning, which also involves asking someone to be your best man or maid of honour. But how exactly do you go about doing that?
You could ask your wedding witness during a friendly chat over dinner or a drink.
If you want to spice things up a bit, pop the question whilst giving her a present.
Give them a little something they’ll like – you don’t need to go to great lengths; it could be a delicious chocolate, a bottle of fine wine, or even a ticket to a concert or the theatre. Hide a note inside the wrapping and write the question on it „Will you be my best man at my wedding?"„
You can take it a step further and ask the question in a humorous way. Feel free to use these phrases, or ones like them:
„My fiancée has already said yes; I’m just waiting for your answer. Will you be my best man?”
„”My wedding can’t go ahead without you, so I hope you’ll say yes. Will you be my best man?"
„My wedding won’t be valid without your signature – please don’t let me down and say yes; be my witness!”
„Will you give your blessing to my marriage in writing as well? Will you be my witness?”
9. What should a wedding witness wear?
A wedding witness is a very important guest, and this should be reflected in their attire.
A wedding witness’s outfit is just right if it makes them stand out from the guests, but does not come close to matching the couple’s elegance.
But what can a wedding witness wear, and what items of clothing should they avoid?
The wedding etiquette In accordance with the rules, witnesses – like other guests – are not permitted to wear black, white or red.
What else should you bear in mind?
- Don’t overdress the young couple
- In the case of women, one should avoid provocative garments with a plunging neckline, or those that are too short or see-through
- Don’t wear anything too fancy
- Don’t wear a better suit than the groom
- Make sure you look neat and tidy
10. What are the duties of a wedding witness?
Compared to the old ways, a wedding witness has it really good these days. 🙂 They don’t have to contribute financially to the newlyweds, and nobody takes offence if they don’t give the most expensive wedding present.
The primary role of a wedding witness is to authenticate the marriage. However, that is not the end of their responsibilities. Let’s take a look at what duties the bride’s and groom’s witnesses have.
11. What are the duties of the bride’s maid of honour?
The bride’s maid of honour is her closest confidante and helper. But what are the tasks she is expected to carry out, and what does she need to coordinate and organise?
The bride’s maid of honour:
- We’ll help you find the most beautiful wedding dress
- She supports the bride both physically and emotionally in the run-up to the wedding and on the big day itself
- She organises her last singles night and comes up with the hen party tasks, ensures that the evening runs smoothly
- It brings together and coordinates the bridesmaids
- He helps with the preparations on the big day and, if necessary, drives or accompanies the bride to the hairdresser and make-up artist
- She helps the bride with everything on the wedding day, holds her bouquet during the ceremony, helps her touch up her make-up, and helps her change her clothes
- At the wedding and the reception, she helps the guests and shows them around
12. What are the duties of the groom’s best man?
The groom’s best man is the best and most devoted guest for the groom-to-be; he helps and supports him in everything. But what exactly are the duties that fall to him?
The groom’s best man:
- Helps you choose the best wedding suit
- It organises the stag party
- She helps the groom get ready for the big day
- It takes the couple to the wedding venue
- Together with her maid of honour, the bride helps to welcome and show the guests around
- He gives a speech in honour of the young couple
- He’s always there when a helping hand is needed; he helps organise the party, gets the guests dancing, and helps sort out overly boisterous guests and other tricky situations
13. Tips for a welcome speech
As we saw in the previous point, one of the best man’s duties is to give a toast in honour of the young couple before dinner. But what makes a good toast? What should you bear in mind, how long should it be, and what should you absolutely avoid saying?
14. Keep these in mind if you want to give a good speech
- An ideal speech lasts 3–5 minutes. It can be shorter or longer than this, but make sure you don’t just say two sentences – nor do you ramble on for 30 minutes
- Don’t improvise; prepare for your speech and practise in front of a mirror
- Focus your conversation on the couple; don’t talk about yourself
- Instead of listing facts, tell stories – your speech will be much more interesting
- Keep your nasty words to yourself
- Structure your speech so that it has both an introduction and a proper conclusion
- It is customary to conclude a speech with congratulations and best wishes
- Sneak a humorous remark or two into your speech, but don’t turn the whole thing into a joke
- Are you nervous about giving a speech? There are plenty of ways to calm your nerves, but save the alcohol for after the speech
- You may have a set of notes in your hand; you can glance at them now and then, but don’t read out the speech
- Speak slowly and enunciate clearly so that everyone can understand what you’re saying
- The speech is for the couple; turn towards them and look at them whilst you’re speaking
- Have a smile 🙂
15. How can you bring a welcome speech to a close?
Here are a few examples of how to conclude a welcome speech:
„Let’s raise a glass to these two special people,
”who have joined their lives together for ever today."
„Let’s raise a glass to the newlyweds!
Today you have sworn an oath of loyalty,
”I wish you all a happy life"
„Let’s raise a glass to the young couple,
”Wishing you much happiness."
Frequently Asked Questions
A wedding witness must meet two criteria. The first is that they must be at least 18 years of age; the second is that they must have legal capacity. Anyone who meets these criteria may act as a witness; anyone who does not may not. A foreign national may also act as a wedding witness.
Organise a dinner or a drinks party to mark the big question. Surprise your prospective best man with a small gift. If you want to add a touch of humour, hide a funny proposal note inside the gift.
The primary role of a wedding witness is to authenticate the marriage. However, they also have a number of other responsibilities, such as organising the hen or stag party, giving a speech, and providing ongoing assistance. Read more in the article.
